How to Manage Stress and Stay Joyful During the Holidays
It’s hard to believe Thanksgiving – and the start of the joyous holiday season – is already upon us.
I love the focus on gratitude, giving, and nurturing relationships – and it’s no secret among my family and loved ones that Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. While I easily find joy in the celebration of abundance and presence, I know that for many of us, that joy gets buried beneath an onslaught of anxiety, stress, busy schedules, and overflowing to-do lists.
When we allow the weight of those obligations to become a burden that prevents us from living deeply and fully in the present moment, we lose sight of the gifts in front of us. Instead, we spend our time rushing from task to task, focusing our energy on everything except what matters most to us.
But what if we could choose another path?
Thanks to four simple practices that can be done any time of year, managing the stress we create for ourselves and maintaining the joy that underpins the very purpose of the holiday season may be simpler than you think.
Ground Yourself in the Present Moment with Breathwork
Breathwork remains one of my favorite tools for grounding in the present moment, likely because of its powerful effect on both the mind and body.
As I’ve mentioned before, stress and anxiety tend to manifest physically when the mind is disconnected from the body—when we mentally transport ourselves to the past or future and lose sight of the present moment. This frequently happens during seasons of busyness, particularly when we’re worrying about what’s ahead or fixating on what’s already gone wrong.
The beauty of breathwork – or controlled breathing – is that it turns our attention to experience present moment sensation. By strengthening the mind-body connection and training the parasympathetic nervous system – which tells our bodies to physically relax – regular breathwork helps us become more resilient, especially during periods of stress.
Practicing breathwork regularly also strengthens the vagus nerve, supporting our immune function, metabolism, and emotional regulation to help us thrive even in the midst of chaos. Since breathwork can also have an energizing and calming effect on the mind, we can approach our priorities with increased clarity and benefit from enhanced productivity along the way.
For a simple breathwork practice, try a progressive exhalation.
In a comfortable seated position, lift through the chest and draw the shoulder blades down and back, and the lower belly in towards the spine, really lengthening through the entire spine for extra support and stability.
Start to notice the count of your natural breath. Then begin to lengthen your inhales and exhales slightly to a count of 4.
After a few rounds, start to lengthen your exhalation while maintaining the count of your inhalation – inhaling for a count of 4 and exhaling for a count of 6. Make sure to expand the entire diaphragm, from the lower belly to the chest, to fully experience the benefits of your breathwork practice.
Continue to lengthen your exhalation for the longest exhale count you can maintain for about 5 minutes – working your way up to an exhale on a count of 8 if that feels accessible to you – and notice your body start to physically relax.
Try working your way up to 20 minutes of breathwork a day and commit to a regular practice to experience the full benefits of breathwork year-round.
Remember, if at any point this holiday season you feel stress or anxiety, even just a few minutes of breathwork can help you reset and refocus your energy.
For additional breathwork practices, try Sun Breath, Anuloma Viloma, or Kapalabhati.
Use Introspection and Reflection to Guide Your Priorities
Reflection and introspection can also support self-regulation during the holidays. We often move at a pace that’s so much faster than what our bodies were designed for, making it difficult to truly process our emotions as we experience them throughout the day.
Eventually, our failure to process and address the emotions and reactions that arise from our daily encounters can cause stress, anxiety, and irritation – on both a physical and mental level.
But simply giving ourselves permission to pause and check in with ourselves throughout the day can help us better move through our emotions, improve our interactions with others, and help us show up as our most empowered selves.
For a simple introspective practice that can be done anytime, anywhere – tune in to how you’re feeling. Ask yourself these simple questions as you experience the physical manifestations of your emotions or emotional blockages:
What am I feeling?
Why am I feeling this way?
Sometimes simply identifying the emotion – also called “affect labeling” – and its cause can have a profound effect on our reactions, not to mention our ability to process and move through it. This connection between labeling emotions and regulating emotional responses in the brain indicates that introspection can be a powerful tool to build resilience.
For additional guidance on using introspection and reflection on a daily basis, check out my Daily Journal Prompts: Intro Guide to Reflection + Introspection for a downloadable PDF.
Create Meaningful Intentions Through Meditation
Meditation is another practice that can be cultivated in advance of the holidays to support our well-being – or used in a stressful moment to re-center and ground in the present.
Many people are intimidated by meditation because they believe they’re “bad” at meditating, or find it too difficult to “empty the mind.” The truth is, all meditation requires is a willingness to direct your attention and awareness.
You can start with a prompt, such as “what do I need more of in this moment?” – or perhaps the introspective questions I shared above if you find yourself particularly agitated and have trouble settling down to stillness and silence.
Some people prefer a moving mediation to start, such as taking a walk with non-lyrical music or engaging in a silent yoga practice. Eventually, working your way up to a seated or supine meditation practice – in both stillness and silence – will help you strengthen your connection to your intuition and get clear on the life you want to lead as well as the experiences you want to create throughout the holiday season.
To help you create meaningful intentions for the holiday season, try this simple meditation practice.
Set a timer for 10 - 20 minutes.
Consider starting your meditation with a few rounds of the breathwork practice outlined above to help focus the mind and relax the body.
As you settle into relaxed stillness following your breathwork practice, allow your thoughts to focus on present moment sensation, such as the feeling of the ground beneath your body.
Use “What do I want to prioritize?” or “What brings me joy?” as your prompt, and notice what arises without judgment.
After your timer signals the end of your meditation, spend time writing in free form to journal what came up during your meditation.
Notice how different thoughts that arose affected your physical body, creating tension or softness, and include in your outpouring of expression. Write down anything that came up, as we often have thoughts that can serve as stagnant energy blocking the energy flow to our heart center if they aren’t processed, expressed, and released.
Next, reflect on the output of your meditation and journaling exercise. Consider how you can translate your musings into actionable priorities that support you emotionally, physically, and spiritually during the holidays. If the thought of spending time with certain people triggered anxiety, limit those interactions. If the idea of engaging in certain activities brought you joy, prioritize those this season.
If this meditation practice doesn’t resonate with you, you can also try setting intentions through visualization.
Set a timer for 20 – 30 minutes, to allow yourself to fully immerse in this visualization exercise.
This practice starts the same as the above, with a short breathwork practice before settling into stillness.
As you start to train your attention and awareness inward, visualize how you want to feel and the experiences you’d like to enjoy this holiday season. Be as detailed as possible as you allow your imagination to create your ideal experience. Use the various senses – perhaps tasting the meal you’re excitedly awaiting on Thanksgiving, feeling the embrace of a family member you’d like to see, or seeing the joy on the face of a loved one once they open your thoughtful gift to them.
Be creative, and don’t limit yourself. Spend as much time as you’d like designing every detail in your mind’s eye, and immerse yourself in the experience. Believe at the core of your being it is real, it is happening, it is yours.
Once the timer signals the end of your meditation practice, identify and write down intentions that will support the manifestation of your visualization – and help the experience you created come to life.
Feel free to repeat any of these exercises as often as you’d like to continue to refine your intentions and get clear on how you’d like to focus your time and energy this holiday season.
Set Personal Boundaries to Protect Your Energy
Lastly, recognize that your time and energy are your most valuable currencies. Set personal boundaries accordingly to protect and conserve them when you need them the most.
While it might seem counterintuitive to take the time to engage in the practices outlined above, it’s these tools that nurture your mind and body – and renew your energy.
These practices can help you deepen your relationship with your intuition, which can be a powerful guide for setting boundaries – especially before periods of anticipated stress or busyness.
To help you determine where you might need to set personal boundaries this season, consider all aspects of your being – your mind, body, spirit, home, and sense of community.
Try using these questions as guidance:
How can you nurture those aspects that feel neglected?
What activities might you build into your regular routine – especially during the holidays – to support you?
In what areas might you need more rest?
What activities or relationships seem to deplete rather than renew your energy?
Where do you need to say “no” when it comes to perceived obligations?
How can you show up more fully for yourself?
What priorities should you set going forward?
Take time to integrate your musings into actionable priorities and steps to help you find balance this holiday season. Remember that as much as we resist it when we’re caught up in periods of busyness, rest truly fuels our productivity.
So slow down this holiday season. Immerse yourself in the present. Give thanks for each moment along the way. Choose to feel love, joy, and gratitude. Savor the little things.
Because that’s what the holidays are really all about.
Interested in diving deeper into these practices? Learn more about working with me one-on-one and reach out to set up a discovery session.
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